Welcome to Day 1 of your new year.
There are 364 just like it to follow. The question is, what will you do with these days?
Will you find yourself on December 31, 2018 in the same place you are today, still in an abusive marriage, wishing your life were different, wishing you had done more with the last 365 days?
Or is 2018 the year you finally say ENOUGH…
I won’t pretend any more….
I won’t make excuses any longer…
I won’t try to fix something that is out of my power to fix…
I won’t settle for a marriage that is permanently broken…
I won’t take the blame for something that isn’t my fault…
I won’t be taken advantage of…
I won’t allow the bullying to continue.
Is 2018 the year you take control of your life, and say YES…
I will stand up for myself…
I will step out of my comfort zone so that I can flourish…
I will take a leap of faith…
I will insist on a better life…
I will embrace change…
I will live the life I was born to live…
I will leave my abusive marriage.
I know it’s scary. But you are not alone. There is an enormous sisterhood of women (myself included) who’ve been through it. You will find support. You will get guidance. I am always here to help.
Just remember, to get the life you want, the life you deserve, you can’t just wait around hoping it falls into your lap. You have to make it happen. You are responsible for your own quality of life. No one else.
Here’s a little exercise I like to give my clients to help them visualize the role divorce can play in changing their lives for the better:
Pretend that you’re looking at a graph, and find the spot on the graph where your life is today. Now find the point on the graph where you want your life to be on December 31, 2018. If you continue down the same path, doing the same things as always, your life (and your marriage) will continue in a straight line, and you will never reach your goal.
In order to reach that place where you want to be, a change must occur. The line must be disrupted in order for it to head in a new direction. So instead of thinking of divorce as the end of something, try to reframe it. Think of divorce as the springboard that catapults you on a new trajectory that will ultimately lead you to your ideal life.
No one deserves to be in an abusive marriage. You can get out. You can have the life you dream of. Make 2018 the year you disrupt the trajectory.